Narrowboat Muriel : Biographies

Our Boy Jack

Sun, 25 Nov 2007 19:59:10 GMT

The J-Files

Name: Jack (Woodgreen Laddie)

Pseudonyms: Herbert; Booboo

Breed: Retriever (Labrador)

Colour: Black

Sex: Dog

Born: 16/09/1995

Registration no: V4463506V04

Favourite food: anything, particularly if it’s been dead a long time.

and so is minging, or has recently passed through

a cow, horse, sheep or rabbit

Favourite ‘beds’: 1. leather chair (particularly at night)

2. bean bag (mainly in evening)

Favourite activities: 1. walkies: daily visits to Nomansland Common to

see his friends (also see ‘Achievements’ below)

2. playing: loves toys and destroying them, usually

ASAP

3. opening presents (anyone’s)

4. being a rascal: often whilst engaged in 1. or 2.

(see criminal record below)

Achievements: 1998: walking from St Albans to Exmouth via

the Ridgeway, Leyland Trail & SW Coat path

1999: walking Wainwright’s Coast to Coast

2000: walking the Two Moors Way & SW Coast

path back to Exmouth

2002: walking the East Devon Way & SW Coast

path back to Exmouth (and then the East

Devon Way again)

2005: walking St Albans to Exmouth via the

Wessex Ridgeway & SW Coast path

2007: surviving radiotherapy for a brain tumour

aged 11 & still being active and happy nearly one-year on

Criminal Record: 1996: Criminal Damage

Circumstances: whilst out walking he did

steal Marge’s fury hat when she bent down

to say hello, and didn’t return it until he was

forced to do so by which time it was a soggy,

muddy ball.

1998: Criminal Damage

Circumstances: whilst Minty (small white Heinz 57)

was a guest for a month, he did rip her foam filled

bed to pieces leaving the house resembling the aftermath

of a snow storm

2007: Criminal Damage

Circumstances: did take a brand new Disney

photo album just purchased at EuroDisney

by his Aunt, and chew off the spine

1995-2007: Various Theft & Criminal Damage

Circumstances: Whenever possible did steal anything left within reach

e.g. slippers, shoes, washing from the line, sandwich box & contents

Other memorable antics: 1997: Climbed a tree

Circumstances: did ‘bear-hug’ a large ivy clad

tree trunk and shuffle up it about 2 feet to

retrieve a ball

2001: Falling in the canal

Circumstances: did attempt to get on the

canal boat whilst it was moving very slowly at

a bridge, but only put on front legs. Ended up upside down

with only 4 paws showing above water

2003ish: Protecting his Mum & Dad

On 2 occasions, did launch himself at

‘strange’ men who suddenly appeared from

bushes in a ‘threatening’ way, shoulder-

barging them to a safe distance.

2007: Being a softy

Circumstances: Following radiotherapy sessions, did

require to be carried out by his Dad despite the fact

that every other dog managed to walk out, all be it

very unsteadily

Personality/ Characteristics: VERY, VERY, SPECIAL

Loveable

Loyal

Soft

Beautiful

Rascal

Fit

Inquisitive

Friendly

Liam

Thu, 22 Nov 2007 17:56:26 GMT

Liam:

aka Pomble

Liam is our 16 ½ year old Border Terrier. He started out life as Simon’s Mum & Dad’s dog, living in Exmouth, Devon. I first met him when he was a young whipper-snapper of 18 months on my first visit to Simon’s folks. Liam’s a real character, a typical terrier with a mind of his own. When visiting, he used to sleep on my bed, and by morning he usually had more of it than I did. He’d then sit on me and stamp his feet to demand some of my toast (that was when I first started going out with Simon and I actually got breakfast in bed!). We used to take him on some lovely long walks along the River Otter and the coastal path. He terrorised Amy his older sister who was a bit overweight and liked a nice quiet life.

When Liam was about 4 ½ we got Jack our first black lab. They got on fine, especially as Liam was larger than Jack for a while, so managed to become established as the boss.

Then in 1995 Simon’s Dad died, and his mum then took over all pooch activities. Liam had always been pampered, but now he thought he was in heaven! He started sleeping on the bed beside his Mum, under a blanket, after having his bedtime treat of half a Cornish Wafer!

He thought he had it made, until Simon’s Mum had a heart attack in 1998. Although she soon returned home, she didn’t feel able to look after Liam properly any more, so he came to live with us. By now we also had Vera, our second black lab, but as both she & Jack had known Liam all their lives, he fitted in without a problem. As for Liam, he was very adaptable e.g. he knew that whilst visiting Devon he could climb on the sofa, when in Wheathampstead the sofa was out of bounds. Unfortunately he now had to get used to receiving only 1/3^rd of the attention and going for much longer walks.

Although we still think of him as Simon’s Mum & Dad’s dog, he has actually spent far more of his life with us than he did with them. He came with us on our 1^st canal trip around the Four Counties Ring, although as he didn’t settle very well he went to Simon’s sister’s when we went round the Leicester Ring. He has a wail of a time on his holidays getting spoilt rotten by everyone.

Liam has had a few memorable exploits over the years. On one infamous occasion Simon’s Dad was walking Liam on the golf course along the cliff edge. Liam started scratching about in a bunker, and a rather stroppy golfer shouted “can’t you read the sign? It says dogs must be kept under control” to which Simon’s Dad replied “he is, I told him to do that”. Liam is also rather partial to hedgehogs, which has caused a few incidents. One morning Simon found a carcass on the lawn which consisted of the spiny shell & a rib cage! Liam had a big grin and bloody chops! On another occasion, he was on my lap whilst I was watching the tele. I was tickling his head and had been for a few minutes when I actually looked down. To my horror, his head was crawling with fleas! He’d obviously had another close encounter in the garden. I instantly launched him across the room, and then when I calmed down, I spent the next hour picking fleas off his head!

Now he’s a little old man and only has one short walk a day, and as he can’t hear or see much he stays on his flexi lead. However, he still seems happy enough, so whilst he is we’ll keep him going. Long may he rein!

Vera: our black lab

Thu, 15 Nov 2007 18:52:27 GMT

VERA

How to construct The Perfect Form

The outer casing must be loose fitting and flexible to allow for plenty of movement, and be reasonably tough. The materials used should provide warmth and be very dark in colour, so that mud and dirt will not show. The coating will need to be soft to the touch and such that it can be brushed out to allow the removal of accumulated dust. The frame will be broad and strong, providing sufficient room inside for the apparatus that will power this formidable creature. The body needs to be set on strong, powerful supports that are themselves positioned on large pads so that a high level of stability is achieved. A broad head must be built with eyes that are dark in appearance, so as to complement the coat, but be bright in every other way. The nose will be sensitive to all scents and smells, no matter how faint, and the mouth strong, its bite firm.

The head should be filled with a large brain capable of clear thought and appreciation. Additional powers will be built-in that are beyond the scope of this description but can be summarized as ‘psychic’. The brain must have the facility to switch off peripheral thought and apply all its energy to a set task, usually determined by the brain itself (for example, chasing a pheasant in preference to walking to heel). This attribute will manifest itself in considerable bravery which, when alloyed to an immense sense of loyalty, can only be considered as being beyond price. The propensity for loyalty combined with the independence afforded by self belief will manifest itself in an interesting attitude towards affection. Basically, attention will be gratefully received and returned, but at arms length. Lap is a word associated with drinking not sleeping.

The physical appearance should be such that any reasonably sighted person would describe it as being beautiful, and such that it would bring a smile to the most ardent dog hater’s lips. This is achieved by every aspect of the form being in perfect proportion and of ideal size. Faultlessness in looks is reflected in physical performance, and unprecedented power will be on tap at a moments notice.

If you manage to put such a thing together or you have a Black Labrador that you recognise from this description, then you are surely blessed.

Vera: Black Labrador bitch. Born in Modbury, Devon. Dec 1996.